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Think you’ve stayed in the hotel from hell once or twice? Think again. Motel 6 might be a bit rough around the edges, but 1408 is just plain nasty; a room in a swank hotel that has a weird history of bringing about suicides, murders and ”˜otherwise’, it’s just the kind of thing that paranormal non-fiction writer, Mike Enslin (played by John Cusack) loves to throw himself into. After all, if he doesn’t die, it’ll make a nice chapter in his latest book.
And he hasn’t died yet ”¦
Now, we’ve all experienced, as travelers, some nasty, nasty goings-on in hotels. From mystery stains on bed sheets to the non-draining bathtub, to the sounds of Phil from Accounting ”˜relieving the boredom’ in the next room, to the quaint realization that not only has the maid tidied your room, but she’s also rummaged through your suitcase ”¦ a hotel can be nightmarish.
But what do you do when your room decides it won’t let you go? And when it starts throwing up apparitions of your dead daughter, or your neglected father, or a variety of dead folk from through the ages, tossing themselves out windows or slashing at you with a carving knife? Put simply, that makes an overpriced mini-bar seem almost friendly.
And that’s the basic premise of 1408 — not that Cusack’s character is in danger so much, more that he’s being toyed with by an evil spirit that, while it could seemingly kill him at any time, would much prefer to just drive him insane instead and let him end his life by his own hand.
And let’s face it; who hasn’t experienced a hotel reservations clerk with similar life ambitions?
“I made my booking over the phone last Tuesday”
“No you didn’t.”
“Yes, I did. I have the confirmation number right here.”
“We’re overbooked. Sorry.”
“Yes, you’re overbooked because YOU SCREWED UP THE BOOKING I MADE LAST TUESDAY!”
“I can call another hotel for you”¦”
“ARGHRGRHGRHRGRH!!!”
See how easy it is?
1408 is not exactly a scary movie, despite the usual pretensions of being as such. In these days where ”˜horror movies’ make every attempt at fitting in under a PG-13 rating so that as many teenagers can see them as possible, there’s precious little scary about even the biggest horror movies, and 1408, while delivering the requisite fake scares and out-of-nowhere jumps, doesn’t ever really put you on the edge of your seat, even if it does exhibit a dark sense of humor.
Manager: “Look, I’m not telling you not to stay in that room for your own good or for the profit of the hotel. Frankly, selfishly, I just don’t want to clean up the mess.”
Samuel L. Jackson makes an early appearance as a hotel manager determined not to allow Cusack’s character to stay in the room in question, and to be fair, it’s a nice ballsy role for a guy like Jackson to deliver. But all too soon, he’s out of the picture, and for the next hour it’s just Cusack versus the room. As much as the veteran actor is generally capable of carrying a movie alone if need be, this one just doesn’t give him enough to work with to make it an emotionally draining must-see.
All in all, 1408 is a little disappointing, but it must be said that it’s far from a bad movie.
What they should have done was put a few porno movies on Cusack’s hotel bill and had him explain them to his wife once he got home ”¦ take it from me, that’s some seriously scary stuff, right there.